October
19, 2004: NFL Week 6 Commentary and Analysis - Baseball Edition
By Ahchie
Move Over Football
Here
is the choice – watch a close National League Championship Playoff game
between the Cardinals and Astros, or watch the Oakland Raiders melt down again,
this time against their bitter rival, the Denver Broncos. If the Raiders can’t
get up for this game at home against a hated rival, then the Raiders have
sunk far lower than thought possible. The final score of 31 to 3 tells the
whole story. Jerry Rice again did not have a reception, making it the third
time in four games that he has not caught a pass. This is no way to treat
a living legend and he is right to want to get out. Now if the Raiders were
actually winning, then maybe it is a different story and Rice would have to
live with the situation. The Raiders finally put the sad situation to rest
on Monday night when they traded him to Seattle.
As
for the Astros, if Houston actually finds a way past the Cardinals, it will
not be because of Roger Clemens. The reason Houston is alive is Brad Lidge,
who has made the fierce St. Louis lineup look silly while going five innings
on three consecutive days in the closer role. In those five scoreless innings,
Lidge has given up only one hit and has struck out nine, while picking up
two saves and a win.
And the other choices are – watch an entertaining shootout between the Vikings and Saints, or watch the gutsy, never-give-up Red Sox against their hated rival, the Yanks. Then the following night to watch the six hour marathon known as game 5 or watch for Mike Martz to make a key coaching blunder on Monday Night Football.
Miscellaneous Red Sox Notes
Hideki Matsui is not as good as the Red Sox have made him look, as for some
reason he just feasts off of BoSox pitching.
Mike Timlin seems to be able to get two strikes on any batter at will – he just has a little trouble with that third one. It seems like every hit off of him has come with 2 strikes and 2 outs.
Pedro Martinez should be pulled immediately after throwing his 99th pitch, no matter what the count is to the current batter.
Tim McCarver should be doing the Cardinals series so we would not have to listen to him.
Cold Turkey Code Violation
St.
Louis reliever Julian Tavarez broke more than his hand after giving up the
game winning home run to Carlos Beltran – he broke the unwritten Cold
Turkey Code of Conduct, which, in part, states that any display of Cold Turkey
should not result in injury to self or others. Throughout BMTG Street
Heat and Wiffle history, there have been many
memorable displays of Cold Turkey, but none have ever had a negative impact
on the game at hand or subsequent games. Cold Turkey is officially defined
in the BMTG Language Guide as a, “Moment
of frustration during BMTG sanctioned sporting events, resulting in the lashing
out at surrounding equipment and inanimate objects.” Cold Turkey moments
are brief flashes and are typically over before the the object in question
lands or stops rolling.
Fox Should Stick with Man vs. Beast
Throughout the ninth inning of the Astros’ victory on Sunday, Fox continuously
showed Phil Garner’s wife in the stands. It felt like we had to watch
her jump up and down and look anxious after every pitch. All that is warranted
is to show her once, maybe twice, but Fox went overboard and made it look
like she was someone marked for death if the Astros did not win the game.
It was reminiscent of the days when Kurt Warner was a superstar for the Rams,
when each week we would have to see shot after shot of his wife in the stands.
 |
| Hope is a good thing... |
As for the Red Sox coverage, Fox seems to revel in the misery of painful losses throughout Boston’s history. National broadcasts do not need to keep reminding us of all the near misses and heartbreaking losses. Those who care already know all the details. Those who don’t know by now are brain dead. On Sunday, with the Red Sox down three games to none, Jeanne Zelasko, in particular, seemed to enjoy making little comments about how bad it is to be a Red Sox fan. Here is a news flash for Fox and Zelasko – it does not feel bad to be a Red Sox fan. There have been tough losses and there is the almost certainty that something crazy is going to happen to derail the dream from becoming reality, but there is always hope. And as Andy Dufresne says, “Hope is a good thing.” Boston plays the game the right way. They embody what is right about baseball because they respect the game. They play with the joy that comes from playing for the love of the game and they play as a team without getting caught up in individual accomplishments. And they never give up, as evidenced by the epic games on Sunday and Monday. When the Sox finally do win the World Series, whenever it happens, the celebration will be that much sweeter.
How To Be Like Brent
If
you want to sound like former 49er and current football announcer, Brent Jones,
just insert the word “phenomenal” as often as possible when describing
something that is better than good. Every once in a while give the phenomenal
tag a break and use “spectacular” instead, but do not forget to
get back to use of phenomenal.
Ever Heard of Onside Kick?
At least two games ended this week with this type of sequence: team is behind,
team scores in fourth quarter to pull closer, team kicks off instead of onside
kick, team never gets ball back because winning team runs out clock.
The
first example was San Diego against Atlanta. With about six minutes to go
and after having just called their final time out on third and three, San
Diego was down by four points and now faced a fourth and three around the
15-yard line. San Diego elected to kick the field goal, pulling within one
point. San Diego, with no way to stop the clock, kicked off to Atlanta, who
then proceeded to get enough first downs to run the clock out and San Diego
never saw the ball again.
First of all, why kick the field goal and then kick off without even attempting an onside kick? By choosing their course of action, they guaranteed that they would still be behind and would need to get the ball back. If you go for it on fourth down and fail, you will be in the same situation (behind and without the ball), but by going for it you at least give yourself the opportunity to score a touchdown that would actually give you the lead and not just pull you to within one point. And the lead, San Diego seems to misunderstand, is the ultimate goal, as you cannot win without it. The key here is that San Diego was out of timeouts. If they had all three timeouts available, then kicking the field goal and going with a conventional kick off may make sense, because then you only need another field goal to win, instead of needing a touchdown, and there is a much higher chance of getting the ball back.
The
other example came Sunday night between the Saints and the Vikings. New Orleans
had just scored a touchdown to pull within seven points with only 2:45 remaining.
New Orleans kicked off, instead of attempting an onside kick, and Minnesota
ran the clock out. New Orleans never saw the ball again. Joe Theismann commented
at the time that New Orleans has got to kick off, meaning he felt they should
not try the onside kick, but he gave no explanation why. New Orleans did have
all three of their timeouts, but all Minnesota had to do was get one or two
first downs to run the clock out. What made Theismann and New Orleans think
that their defense could stop Minnesota? Minnesota scored 38 points and ran
and passed at will against New Orleans all night. Why should New Orleans be
able to stop them now? The only course of action that seems reasonable would
be to try the onside kick. If you fail, you will merely be in the same situation
as if you had kicked off, but at least you give yourself the opportunity to
get the ball back and march down the field again on a Minnesota defense that
you just scored on.
Questions for Mike Martz
Mike Martz is becoming legendary for his tendency to make horrible calls.
Each week we will pose a new question to Martz. At the end of the season we
will compile his errors into an open letter.
This week's question:
Due to much more exciting options (Red Sox, game 5), Mike Martz may get a free pass, unless Brother Nature is able to provide some insight in a timely manner. Until then, there will be no question for Mike Martz this week.
Commentator Spotlight: Al Leiter
As
with previous Commentator Spotlights, the goal here is to illustrate what
brilliance and insight that particular commentator brings to the table by
using one example that best encapsulates the viewing experience. In the case
of Al Leiter, the example is his pitching analysis when he essentially said
that if a pitcher makes good pitches, he will be successful. He even demonstrated
the point by showing video of successful pitchers hitting their spots and
making good pitches.
Michael Irvin Update
While Michael Irvin seemed happy and content, he did not seem as jovial as
usual, as there were no screaming laughs to open the show or mixed in throughout
the show. A screaming laugh is one where the laughter is so strong that the
head is thrown back with the mouth wide open, followed by the slapping of
the table with one's hands. There were also no racial overtones to Irvin’s
commentary, further strengthening the BMTG’s belief that he is not racist.
His commentary, however, is getting to be very questionable. Irvin stated
that it was a good loss for Seattle when they gave up a late 17-point lead
to St. Louis in week five. He reasoned that they would learn from it and that
they wouldn’t want to go into the New England game undefeated anyway,
implying that they couldn’t handle the pressure. Steve Young correctly
refuted him saying there is more pressure now, because if they lose they fall
closer to the middle of the pack instead of establishing themselves as one
of the top tier teams. Irvin then jumped in and said they need that pressure,
even though earlier he indicated that the pressure of coming in undefeated
would not be a good thing. Mike Ditka told Irvin that there is no such thing
as a good loss, but Irvin kept insisting that the meltdown against St. Louis
was good for Seattle.
Irvin did correctly call the Green Bay game, saying that it was time for the Packers and Brett Favre (pronounced fawv-ruh) to explode. Green Bay went on to defeat Detroit 38 to 10.
Irvin’s thoughts on other players:
He would take Mike Vick, no question, if asked to choose between Vick and LaDainian Tomlinson, indicating that San Diego has not made it to the playoffs despite phenomenal years from L.T. and Atlanta is headed to the playoffs with Vick.
He said Jerry Rice is the best ever, but he is done and should be a mentor to the young Oakland receivers.
He said the Ben Roethlisberger is the real deal and Mark Brunell should be benched.
Fantasy Notes
Throcksmorton decided to take his annual self-imposed sanction by
keeping all three Indianapolis players through their bye week, earning him
this season’s first official Egregious Error.
Mike
Vick, after performing fair to mediocre through the first five weeks of the
season outperformed both Donovan McNabb and David Carr combined. Naturally,
this is the first week that Ahchie did not have Vick on his roster.
The "questionable" status burned several owners this week. Travis Henry and Santana Moss were the two most notable examples.